I am a danger to myself....

Yes, that's right...I have somewhat known for quite awhile but I now totally convinced I am a danger to myself. I don't have to worry about anyone else being a danger to me because I will almost more likely do more damage to myself than anyone else can inflict on me. I am writing this while having a sprained ankle, a banged up knee, and a corneal eye infection. Now, the cause of the corneal eye infection is still a mystery but a lot of ailments I have had since I have moved to Hawaii are mysteries. Or that's what the doctors here keep telling me. I personally think that they are all just blowing smoke up my ass but hey I'm not a doctor! I refused to go to the doctor for the sprained ankle because I was worried that they might say that they may have to amputate it or something off the wall like that. The doctors here are a little strange to say the least. So I had my good friend (she's a PA in sports medicine) come over to assure me that I did not break it because this sprain was a little more painful than my other past 8 ankle sprains. Now, I am self aware that I am not the most coordinated person in the world but this is now becoming a major issue. So far in my lifetime I have broken both my arms, a finger, sprained my ankles 9 times, pulled out my back a few times, and let' s not start on my battle scars that I have obtained from fighting with inanimate objects and losing! And most of these injuries have a funny story behind them and some I do blame the Captain, Jack, and Jim for being cohorts in my demise. These newest injuries occurred last Friday night. Now, when people ask what happened and I start telling them when it happened, the first question I get is "were you drunk?" For the record, I was coming home from a local bar but I was not drunk. I had a happy buzz but not drunk. Unfortunately, I decided to get into a fight with the sidewalk and the outcome of that battle did not come out in my favor. So maybe it is a sign that drinking, walking, and inanimate objects in my world should not be combined! I think I would be the safest just not going out at all. However, I have had accidents happen in the home also and they did not include any alcohol. So I guess I am just doomed either way!
What's a girl to do? Well, this one will just add another injury earned to her already long list and stick a bright sign on her that says "Danger" and just keep rolling!

Love and Kisses,
Rosebud